I admit that I am often overly ambitious. I tend to make lofty, sometimes grandiose plans for myself. It usually happens after seeing someone else do something I want to do. Whether it is playing an instrument, learning a certain dance, or creating my own comic—I have an assortment of “life goals” that I want to accomplish. I like to think that it’s mostly for my own satisfaction, although I’m sure there’s some desire for for public admiration in it as well.
When I was in high school, I defined myself as a blogger. This was before people actually made a living as bloggers. This was in the era of LiveJournal and Blogger. My blog was nothing special; it was basically a digital journal. I blogged because I lived in a slightly boring suburb located outside of Saint Louis and because I spent too much time online. During my freshman year of university in Saint Louis, I stopped blogging because for the first time in my life, I had a bit of a social life offline. Several years have passed since I last wrote a blog entry, and I have changed a lot. But one thing remains—I still spend too much time online.
This is typical behavior for a user interface designer living in San Francisco, yes, but lately I’ve noticed the time I spend online is not very meaningful. Back in Saint Louis, I was always online, but I was drawing, editing photos, creating web sites, or writing. But today I just browse Tumblr and Pinterest and admire other people’s creations. Which is fine occasionally, when looking for inspiration or ideas, but at some point, I stopped creating.
This year, I will fulfill one of my major life goals—in May I will finally go to Japan for the first time. I want to capture every moment while I am there, so I am using this trip as an excuse to start blogging again. But really, when I think about it, I realise that more than documenting this trip, maintaing a blog keeps me accountable. Any goals I publicly state on my blog, I feel much more obligated to follow than the list of goals that float around inside my head. Because even if my only reader is my mother, I know that someone out there is waiting to see what I can do. What I can draw, what I can write, what I can create, and what I have to share.